The Aim conversation = inspiration

Sick rhyme, in the title. Today I realized that I just want to be happy. That I just want to go with the flow, and let life take me where it wants too. There is always some hitch in the plan though. I know I will not be happy just doing something I love, because I will not be happy unless I make my family proud. I also will not be happy just doing something to make them proud, doing something I love. No, I can not be happy unless I am making a difference in a large number of lives. So it is not just a matter of doing what I love anymore. The flow might just lead me to a waterfall, and somehow i need to avoid the bottom. I just do not know how exactly how to avoid it. Here is what I came up with so far. When I reach the edge, maybe I will need to get out of the river and go in a different direction. Like get out of the kayak and hike east instead of flow south. So I would not be going backwards, but a different direction completely. Some where I have not gone yet, but would not be able to get to with out first heading south. Either way I would be doing something I love and getting somewhere, new. That is my new outlook on life. Wander around productively, learning and seeing along the way, until someplace looks like a good destination. God I love shitty metaphors. I hope this makes sense. Actually I don't.